LAWYERS & RATS. From Atticus Legal, Lawyers Hamilton
I’m starting to like this thing called blogging. It’s very liberating. There are two main things I like to poke fun at – myself and lawyers in general. So here goes (two birds with one stone). Did you know that scientists have now started using lawyers instead of rats for their experiments? Why? They bond less with the lawyers.
Honestly, if you tell people you’re a lawyer these days you can see a little quiver in their irises. Am I being too sensitive? Hey, don’t judge me man!
Do you know why legal documents produced by some lawyers don’t have much, if any, punctuation (especially wills, trust deeds, etc)? Curious isn’t it? It’s because they’re afraid that a comma, semicolon or full stop might make a significant difference to how a court may interpret the clause, so they play for safety and leave out the punctuation. A little Alice in Wonderland, don’t you think? It can mean whatever you want it to mean. My goodness, effectively those lawyers don’t feel confident in their own ability to express themselves clearly.
There’s been a Law Society drive over the last 20 or so years imploring lawyers to express themselves in ‘plain English’ so that their clients can actually understand their advice and the documents they produce. Have you seen much plain English from your lawyer recently? Old habits die hard. Lawyers like it when the law appears to be mysterious and complicated. They think it makes them look clever. Why say ‘buyer beware’ when ‘caveat emptor’ sounds better, right?
I’ll end on a low note. What do you get if you cross a lawyer with the Godfather? An offer you’re not meant to understand.
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